How you build a purposeful life.
It's probably not what you think.
A coworker opened our leadership-team meeting with this icebreaker:
“If you could talk about one thing for the rest of your life, what would it be?”
I didn’t hesitate: the meaning of life—how we find it, how we steep ourselves in it.
Little did I know at the time, that singular question, asked during a mundane status meeting, planted a seed that changed my entire life.
In the days that followed that meeting I couldn’t stop wondering. If this – living lives of meaning – really was the thing I wanted to talk about, why wasn’t I?
At the same time I started to notice how often my conversations felt hollow — not just the ones at work, but all of my conversations. People would ask me about my job or life, and I’d just say: ”Everything’s fine”, or some variation of that. I felt like I had nothing to draw from. Everything felt hollow.
I felt hollow.
Up to that point, so many of my life decisions—how I spent my time, who I spent it with—were shaped by convenience, expectations, or obligations I didn’t think to question. A ceaseless pressure I carried to live up to some imaginary picture of “success.” Never did I consider there could be another way to make choices. A different compass I could use.
Then it hit me — while sitting at the kitchen table, as most epiphanies do — what if the truest compass for life isn’t really a path, but following the questions that light you up?!
Because questions act like breadcrumbs. They point us toward the ideas and energies that make us come alive. When we let questions guide us, they lead us to the conversations that illuminate the truth we need to follow.
The hard work of letting questions lead the way.
I used to think that my purpose rested just over the horizon — held within that next job, the more aligned title, or a better company culture. But that never turned out to be true. Even inside a values-first company, I wasn’t given more chances to truly help people. Climbing higher on the ladder didn’t make it any easier for me to create real change.
We love stories of people breaking free from default systems and corporate shackles — we all cheer when they do — but the real work comes after.
When I made the decision to follow my curiosity, and thus make different choices, it came with a lot of unknowns. At first it was an adrenaline rush — wow, I’m doing this thing, look at me! But pretty quickly after that sugar-high wore off the real work was waiting. The task of unraveling who I thought I was, and the certainty that came with it.
In the last few months I’ve had to let go of a lot of things — things I didn’t even realize I was carrying, like:
Knowing what was going to come next, where exactly I would plant my foot
Having snappy answers to simple questions like “How’s work?”
The comfort of having a default network of people to talk to, co-workers are good for that
But every time I make a decision rooted in the questions I care about, I strengthen my capacity to hear my inner voice. I teach myself that I can be trusted. And I practice working with a different kind of compass to move myself forward.
Centering not just the conversations I want to have, but creating space to welcome the people who want to have them too.
Stepping towards my purpose one question at a time.
Purpose in action.
Every program and space I create—like Joy Circles and this Substack—are living examples of how questions have become my guide. Each one is a container for me to engage with other kindred humans, also grappling with what it means to live with meaning, in a difficult world:
How do we reclaim our power from toxic systems?
How do we live in greater harmony with the earth and with ourselves?
What does it mean to build a soul-aligned life in this moment?
These questions are stepping stones, the conversations they engender become my compass, and the communities built from them are the ones I want to be a part of.
When we allow ourselves to follow the questions that matter most we discover not just what we care about, but who we want to be, and how to build lives that reflect that purpose.
Are you asking the same kinds of questions?
I’d love to see you in a Joy Circle!
Joy Circles are not your typical group experience. These are not drop-in classes, surface-level convos, or a one-way “workshop” where all you do is listen. Think intimate dinner party, full of thoughtful humans, who want to reclaim their power to make the world a better place.
If that’s you, then I want you at that table!
There are two cohorts starting in September, meeting 1x a week for 3 consecutive weeks:
Cohort 1 - Zoom, Tuesday evenings (PST) starts Tuesday, September 16th
Cohort 2 - Zoom, Friday mornings (PST) starts Friday, September 19th
*Discounts for paid subscribers.
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